You could always flip a coin – heads it’s roses and lace, tails you pick up the little sailor suit. There are more efficient and practical ways to make sure that you pick up clothing and accessories that will be appreciated and useful.

Gender-Neutral Colors

The easiest way, of course, is to stick with gender neutral colors in your choices. As a culture, we’re fond of dressing babies in pastels, but you don’t have to limit yourself to pale yellow and baby green to be safe. There are lots of other gender-neutral colors to choose from.

Looking for a crib set that isn’t gender-specific? White and ivory are good choices, and you can actually get away with eyelet and lace as long as it’s not too delicate. A plump white comforter and matching crib bumpers work just as well for a boy as for a girl.

Primary and bright, clear secondary colors are another great way to avoid the gender tangle when selecting clothing and accessories for baby. Bright red, blue, green and yellow sleepers will look adorable no matter what gender the baby turns out to be. Pick onesies in turquoise, orange, dark green or red, either all a solid color, or with contrasting ribbing along the edges.

Go for the unusual. Imagine how high the adorable meter will raise if you outfit baby’s room in tuxedoed penguins sporting bright red, blue and yellow ribbons, or pick up a t-shirt emblazoned with red, yellow and blue balloons. You can even pat yourself on the back for choosing bright colors for the baby’s room and accessories. As much as we love pastel baby togs, babies respond far better to bright, clear colors.

Gender Neutral Patterns

If you’re not sure on the boy/girl issue, keep in mind that you can err more easily on the boy side than the girl. A baby girl in a t-shirt printed with sports motifs is cute. You just wouldn’t put a little boy in a sleeper printed with tiny sprigs of daisies. Teddy bears and duckies are one gender-neutral choice, but you can find adorable, unique prints that will stand out. Some of the more clever that we’ve seen around lately – Noah’s Ark, lions and tigers, traffic signs, seasonal themes (candy canes, pumpkins, candy corn?).

Other gender neutral patterns that work for boys or girls clothing include candy color stripes, odd-size polka dots and abstract patterns. Pick a motif, pick a color and have a blast dressing your baby in clothes and accessories that don’t scream boy or girl.

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There are some things we take for granted in today’s world. Day in and day out we know the sun is going to rise in the morning and set at night, the freeway is going to be jam packed with traffic every Friday afternoon from about three pm until six or seven, and people who are having a baby shower will be able to tell us whether the cute blue sailor suit or the pretty pink dress will be an appropriate gift. Until, of course, we learn that the drive home on Friday was smooth sailing and the expectant mother whose shower we’re attending has no idea what the gender of her baby is. Eyeing the sun superstitiously, we head to the mall and try to figure out what sort of shower gift to buy when we have no idea whether we’re buying for little Jerry or little Elaine.

Interestingly, we forget that its only been about twenty-five years or so since we even had the option of knowing in advance whether the new arrivals in our lives would one day use the “his” towel or the “hers” towel and shower gifts were always either androgynous or delivered with a store receipt included. Because we now take the medical technology of an ultrasound for granted we forget that purchasing shower gifts without the advance knowledge of the combination of X and Y chromosomes included in the pending package was once the rule rather than the exception.

A great many people today either choose not to know the sex of their babies before delivery (“Don’t point anything out to me on that weather map, doc”) or, for whatever reason are unable to know (“Is that my son, Doc?” “No, Mr. Jones… that’s the umbilical cord.”). For these reasons gifts are still readily available in “unisex” varieties, making them equally appropriate for baby girls or baby boys.

Purchasing unisex gifts is easier than many people may think. The first rule is to simply avoid anything that is decidedly pink or blue. Those two colors will forever have the gender bias unmistakably attached to them. Pale blues may be appropriate for either gender, but there’s no getting away with putting any shade of pink on a baby boy. We’ve just not come that far yet. Whites, reds (dark reds, crimsons, and scarlet hues, no fuchsias), and greens work fine. If it’s on the flag of Mexico or Italy, run with it. Clothing items can be avoided altogether in favor of nicely androgynous layette sets with white onesies, white socks (no “frillies”), and completely asexual spit-up towels or some similar purchase.

Of course, if you prefer, it is still acceptable to purchase a gender specific gift for the expectant mother who does not know the sex of her unborn child… just remember to save your receipt.

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